Peace of my Mind

Well Derek has left to do some sort of work-related business back in Canada and to check in with our 3 little ones.  I am here, in Barbados, an island paradise.  So why when he was leaving did I feel out of sorts?  He left a spare key.  He explained the security system. I have contact numbers for people on the island.  He stocked the fridge with beer and wine.  He even got me Haagan Daz.  Yes they have Haagan Daz in Barbados.  I found that out early.  So here I am.  In a situation that was once commonplace.  No ties.  No responsibilities. However, after years of family life, I have grown accustomed to a certain amount of controlled chaos.  I have been parenting since before my newest invention, e-parenting, was even possible.  

So far, I have rearranged the furniture and reorganized Derek's office.  I know he will be pleased to read this.  I then decided it was time to accept that I was going it alone for the next few days.  I put on my big-girl flip flops and went to the beach.  After a lovely sunset, I am back.  I am in, what Bridget has termed, my pre-jamas.  I am going to think about a girl dinner, like raw vegetables, cheese and crackers and ice cream.  I am finishing my blogging.  I find it funny that a noun I had never used until a few days ago, has become a verb I use frequently.  

So I am going to spend a few days getting familiar with solitude.  I have no real ties on this island.  Yet.  I have beer and wine.  I don't expect any great epiphanies.  I do however think it is a good time to "find" myself.  With a tub of Haagan Daz, I expect I will be finding myself in my kick-ass kitchen.